Friday, August 9, 2013

The Silence is Deafening!

I was going to name this post, 'Fun With Insomnia', only it's not fun!

As my husband tells it, I have trouble shutting down my hard-drive at night. 

The house is darkened, it's late, the temperature is good, the bed is comfortable, I'm medicated, and it's quiet.  It's too quiet.   

We're so blessed with this life, then why can't I just go to bed like a normal person?

Here's the process I'm now suckered into acting out before the Sandman does his thing.

I must have the television on.  I know that's a big NO-NO! It has to be tuned to something I have absolutely NO interest in watching, hearing, learning from or paying attention to.  This could be a movie I've seen many times, a television show rerun, or a documentary on a topic I truly can skip.

The second step is letting my brain go through the thoughts that may include any, or all, of the following:

          "Wonder what my daughter's up to right now?"
          "What was that noise?"
          "Did I lock both doors?"
          "So, that's why men have nipples!"
          "There was an error on King of Queens tonight.  The price tag on his shirt disappeared!"
          "Funny how that post office lady guessed the city where I was born, correctly!"
          "I should check that receipt for errors."
          "That sounds like a frog or something!"
          "Why on Earth would anyone want to create 'fake' ground beef??"
          "Douglas Fairbanks Jr. in Gunga Din is called Valentine."
          "Douglas Fairbanks Jr. as Valentine says his last day in the French Legion is February 14th."
          "That's Valentine's Day here....did they do that on purpose?"
          "Why did I just think of that?"
          "No, wait.  He says, May 14th.  That's not Valentine's Day."
          "What should I make for dinner tomorrow?"
          "Another error on King of Queens was that pan of chicken that kept changing places!"
          "I have a lot of veggies to use up.  I'll make soup."
          "I should sleep. If only I was at the beach.  I always sleep well near water."
          "I love waves."
           (Bathroom break)
          "What is that song's name?  la-la-lala dum. Never mind."
          "Can't forget to make that call tomorrow."
          "Was that thunder?  It may rain again tonight."
           (Bathroom break)
          "How does that go again? 1-3-0-1-2-3?"
          "I used to love that jacket I had when I was 12."
          "Oh, yeah...there's the rain.  I hear it on the roof."
           (Bathroom break)
          "Is that a frog I hear?"
          "I should not have had that last bottle of water tonight."
           (Bathroom break)

Lastly, not only is the mind going at a breakneck pace but I rock!  I mean I literally rock myself back and forth in bed.  Our marriage has lasted only because of a memory foam mattress.  As it stands, I can do Pilates, stretches, and even the Electric Slide in bed and not wake my husband (who has no problems sleeping!)  There's my 'shout-out' for Tempurpedic.

My body may not run like it did at 17 but my mind is racing all over the place.  Eventually, exhaustion kicks in, after covering so many miles of data, and I sleep. 

I sleep.

I sleep until 4am when Tommy's alarm rings.  He wakes, he cuddles, he tells me he loves me and to go to sleep.  Really? Waaaaaaah!

I will either resolve to nap later, completely awaken at this time and chat, try to read, do a puzzle, check Facebook, or turn on I Love Lucy reruns and, eventually, sleep.

Thus, people wonder why they don't hear from me, why there are times the phone goes to voicemail in the afternoon or late morning, or why I sound so out of it when they call.

Please see above.

Oh....and it was a frog.

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